The Day My Toddler Rebuked Me
“Try that again- with honor and respect this time, mama”
The reprimand coming out of my 2 year olds mouth stung, a bit. He was right of course. I did need to “try again with honor and respect” as I addressed my 4 year old daughter, who was too busy playing with her Elsa doll to buckle her carseat belt in the back of our Subaru.
We were running late for school drop off, so naturally my daughter was moving in slow motion. The baby was crying, my 2 year old had taken off his shoes and I hadn’t had time to eat breakfast or drink a cup of coffee. My daughter not getting into her carseat was my breaking point and my requests for her to hurry turned to shouts about her making us late, as if yelling at a toddler has ever been a useful approach.
Cue my 2 year old calling me out, here.
As humbling as it is to be reprimanded by a 2 year old, there was something more happening in that moment-
I spend most minutes of most days attempting to plant tiny seeds in my children that I hope will one day come to fruition. And my kids spend most minutes of most days repeating frustrating patterns of behavior so it’s easy to feel like I’m wasting my time trying to plant these seeds. In that moment, though, I got to see a tiny little root sprout out of a seed that I’ve planted a thousand times.
I can’t tell you how many times every single day I say the phrase, “try that again- with honor and respect”. It’s a simple way to raise the standards of how our children speak to us and to each other. All day long I find myself saying, “honor and respect” “honor and respect” “honor and respect”.
Hearing my words being regurgitated out of my 2 year old’s mouth felt like getting a little high five from the Lord. It was a sweet reminder that all of my seed planting, though exhausting and discouraging at times, was worth all of the repeating.
The Bible is full of verses that refer to this idea of seed planting. Ecclesiastes 11:6 says, "Sow your seed in the morning, and at evening let your hands not be idle, for you do not know which will succeed, whether this or that, or whether both will do equally well.”
The further along I get in parenting, the more I realize how very little control I have. I can’t control the choices my children will make or the words they will say. I can’t control what is happening within their hearts or their minds. The one thing I can do, is plant seeds. I can remind them what the Bible says about their choices and their words and the condition of their heart. I can point them to the creator of the world and remind them of the worth they can find in Him.
“Try that again with honor and respect” - seed planted.
“You can forgive your brother for hitting you because you were given forgiveness for every sin when Jesus died on the cross for your sins”- see planted.
“It gives us joy in our hearts to share our toys because the Bible says that every good gift we have been given comes from the Lord” - seed planted.
When I think of it this way, I can move from feeling fearful and anxious over my lack of control and I can move toward feel excited and empowered regarding this very important task of seed planting that the Lord has entrusted me with.
What an honor to carry the burden of planting and watering seeds in the heart of my children. What a blessing to have the ability to pray on their behalf to the Lord and ask that he would allow those seeds to one day plant roots and grow them into faithful adults.